I have this sim card which I could not really discard even though I am no longer using it. I don't want to use its number anymore because my father has it and I just want to cut every possible means of communication with him. I load it every three or four months so that it won't expire. The reason is there is one message in this sim card from someone that I could not erase. This is from someone and the only person I met that believes that I am not that useless after all, that I am worthy.
When I was still young my grandfather used to call me dumb and useless. My grandmother said that I should not fight back against other people even if they step on me. She said that I have to give way to other people, she planted in my mind that I am an unwanted child and I have to be thankful that I was given a chance to live in this world. She's a nice person, I could see it on the way she treated my cousins.
And so I grow up and used that people beat me. I hold a grudge of everyone of them. I can still remember that classmate of mine who punched my nose when I was in the third grade or my classmates that don't want me to join them when they play.
Then I met the guy who sent the text message that I still keep up to this date. He seldom talks and he has other set of friends. One time almost everyone in the office is having a hard time with their performance at work and I share to them as well that I am having hard time too. He said this word " well I think **** you're good in everything" that stunned me for a second. After a few weeks he resigned and I found out that he was teaching at a highly reputable university in the country which I could not afford to enroll myself at. I sent him a text message, just a casual "hi" and "hello" to catch up on things. And this was his reply : " Hi, ****. How's it going? You're getting big pay now? Hehehe. Take care, bro. Regards me to the group. You're a good kid. You'll make waves there. Take care. "
Sometimes when I really feel down and blue I read his messages and it really inspires me a lot. Knowing someone out there who which is not related to me believes that I can make things happen makes me feel great. Knowing that there is one person who believes in me even if others don't makes me feel great.
The next thing I know he is now in Guam. I don't know what he is doing in there. But I hope that one day he would stumbe upon this blog and would read this entry. Thank you for the inspiration and thank you for believing in me.
When I was still young my grandfather used to call me dumb and useless. My grandmother said that I should not fight back against other people even if they step on me. She said that I have to give way to other people, she planted in my mind that I am an unwanted child and I have to be thankful that I was given a chance to live in this world. She's a nice person, I could see it on the way she treated my cousins.
And so I grow up and used that people beat me. I hold a grudge of everyone of them. I can still remember that classmate of mine who punched my nose when I was in the third grade or my classmates that don't want me to join them when they play.
Then I met the guy who sent the text message that I still keep up to this date. He seldom talks and he has other set of friends. One time almost everyone in the office is having a hard time with their performance at work and I share to them as well that I am having hard time too. He said this word " well I think **** you're good in everything" that stunned me for a second. After a few weeks he resigned and I found out that he was teaching at a highly reputable university in the country which I could not afford to enroll myself at. I sent him a text message, just a casual "hi" and "hello" to catch up on things. And this was his reply : " Hi, ****. How's it going? You're getting big pay now? Hehehe. Take care, bro. Regards me to the group. You're a good kid. You'll make waves there. Take care. "
Sometimes when I really feel down and blue I read his messages and it really inspires me a lot. Knowing someone out there who which is not related to me believes that I can make things happen makes me feel great. Knowing that there is one person who believes in me even if others don't makes me feel great.
The next thing I know he is now in Guam. I don't know what he is doing in there. But I hope that one day he would stumbe upon this blog and would read this entry. Thank you for the inspiration and thank you for believing in me.
even though my grandparents werent like that. I had people who kepton stepping on me while I was growing up.
ReplyDelete*BIG BEAR HUG* Dont ever let people step on you. Always stand up to what you believe in. He's not the only one who thinks you're good. Me too, and i;m quite sure a lot of other people who reads your blog too-think you're good.
:)
p.s. just making sure Herbie Derbie is always here when you're done ;)
Join ako kay Herbs sa pagbibigay sa iyo ng isang BIG HUG. :)
ReplyDeleteWe believe in you. Think of it you're just in an obstacle course and in the end, we'll get over it. Prove to them that you are worthy. :)
ReplyDeletecount me in. a *big hug* for you.
ReplyDeleteme thinks you're a very strong person.
we all need people to believe in us. pampaboost ba ng ego... if it means anything i believe in you, too. :D
ReplyDeletebibigyan pa kita ng power-hug coz of that. sweet naman at sentimental ka rin pala sa ganyang mga bagay. ako naman. yung book na binigay sa akin ng crush kong classmate ko ang nakatago pa rin at iniingatan ko, nakita niya kasi akong nanghihiram ng book palagi eh meron spare ang kuya niya kaya binigay niya sa akin. that was the first time na namigay siya ng gamit at ako lang ang binigyan niya. *sigh* kung pwede nga lang maging kami
ReplyDeleteit takes a lot of effort to hold a grudge and almost none to let go. with someone as thoughtful and brilliant as you are, imagine the possibilities if you used all of that energy holding onto the intensity of those painful memories for your own growth instead.
ReplyDelete