How gross!

I once asked myself if I am a normal person or not. I am confused. I sometimes asked them if they feel the same way and their answers are almost the same and mine is totally different. Just for example, I asked them if they have a crush towards their cousins or any member of the family. They said that they don't. I do. I mean not just like a sort of admiration, not just like how I feel towards Britney Spears, Paris Hilton or Madonna. Something more than that. Something like how I feel towards Ian Veneracion, Daniel Radcliffe and those hunks in Hollywood, something like that. I dream that I can be with them in bed and make love to them. They don't think that this is normal, me too, I guess. I can't really say that this is not right. Well, I know that some people are not open about the idea or marriage within the family. I have a first degree cousin who got married to our second or third degree cousin, I am not sure. The marriage caused a stir in our little barangay. I know that not all people are open about this kind of thing. But I am. I guess because I like my cousins. I am not a good looking person and so are they.

I am free today. No work. I want to spend my entire day inside my room and just read some books. I joined in a chatroom and someone posted this video. I can't find the right words to describe if this is gross, insane or something. But I find the video disgusting. Its like I want to throw up. I want to commit suicide but definitely not this way. Not this kind of thing. I just want to puke right now. For those of who are interested this is the link http://www.1guy1cup.net . This video is not for the faint hearted. Gawd.