Monday, May 11, 2009

fast lane

Every time I want to do something, I want them done as fast as I can. I dream of things and I want to have them without a length of time waiting. I always wanted to achieve things fast.

If I compare what I have achieved in life with my colleagues, my achievements is nothing compared to theirs. They have done great things as how I see it. It seems that they have overtaken me. I feel that they are so distant from where I am.

I want them to stay with me. Stay with me, where I am, and achieve things together. However, they have achieve things before I even knew it. I feel like I am stranded, unable to move and is so distant from the others. I felt envious of how fast they have moved. They have already finished their Bachelor degrees while I am still studying and stuck. Others have their new boyfriends already and I am still alone.

It sounds selfish but how I wish they never achieved those things in life. How I wish that they are still where I am at. I feel so alone and so little about myself. I know that its not good to compare myself to others but I can't help it. When I look into the mirror, I can see my self as a failure.


  1. self pity gets you nowhere. just dont be too fast and smell the flowers once in a while. sweetie, you're still young. look at what the horizon could bring.

    i know that not all of us get through the same shits but i wish you'd get through this. only you can help yourself. just don't lose hope. life is just way too precious to let go off.

    some times..i dunno if im really getting through you with what i say here or not or if im just wasting my hopes trying to get you back to happy again.

    i miss the good ol bubbly and happy grammath. yung hindi masyadong emo at suicidal.

  2. "Life is suffering." (-the Buddha) "Neurosis is the avoidance of necessary suffering." (- C.G. Jung)

    I also wouldn't not compare myself to others because only you have your destiny and our small minds can't possibly comprehend the entire path to getting there. Cheer up!

  3. hi gramy.. each of us are made differently. so what if your contemporaries have achieved things already? we cannot know what's in store for us in the future. for all we know, there is a great thing for you, just waiting round the bend? whats important is that we dont lose hope and remain steadfast in our convictions, always performing and never slacking in your job. your time will come.. that person you're waiting for will come.

  4. a mentor once said to me that i should never compare my success with the success of others. you should be your own competition. we all go through things and different paces. :D

  5. Slow down and enjoy life. It's not only the scenery you miss by going too fast - you also miss the sense of where you are going and why... Eddie Cantor

    ..mukhang depressed ka lately..go out! meet your friends..kung anuman yan..kaya mo yan!