Bullies

I'm getting tired of going to McDonalds from time to time to take advantage of their free wi-fi. My new place doesn't have any internet connection and I have no plans of getting one. Its easy to spot free wi-fi hotspots here in Metro Manila. Some of the best things here are still free. I haven't watch Avatar yet. I'm still downloading it and its far from being complete. I'm starting to love my job. Its very challenging and its pretty hard. I just don't like my office mates. They spend most of their time bullying me. I wonder why they get pleasure of doing it. Maybe some people are really just like that. Born to be a bully. Its kinda sad.

Living with men

I move to a different place almost a week ago. I'm living with three other men. I think I am a personality disorder. I just figured out how hard it is to live with other guys. This could be the reason why despite of living in a congested area surrounded by good looking guys I still end up being single. And I am grateful that I am not in a relationship while living here. The less you are attached with a person, the better. I wonder why there are a lot of people who wants to be in a relationship while living here in Metro Manila.

My housemates where all fine. Its easy to get along with them. But I sometimes think that they are looking at my stuff when I'm not around. I'm just wondering why is it that one of them is using a "vaginal douche." I don't really know what its for but its clearly written in the label. It could be that one of them is gay too but were men and men don't have vagina's. Is there any other use of this product? I definitely don't have any idea.

welcome to the club

I was taking a break from this 3-4 month study hard thing that I have to endure, Hopefully I could breathe air 4 months from now anyway, I found this very interesting article. I'm not really excited about Robert Pattinson because I know that he's straight but this article just make me giggle, sorry I just can't help it.

So for this who doesn't have any idea, Robert Pattinson will be on the cover for Details magazine for their March 2010 issue. On the photo shoot he said "I really hate vaginas. I'm allergic to vagina. But I can't say I had no idea, because it was a 12-hour shoot, so you kind of get the picture that these women are going to stay naked after, like, five or six hours. But I wasn't exactly prepared. I had no idea what to say to these girls. Thank God I was hungover."

I'm just so excited with these words. Could this be the sign that he's gay? Gad. What a wonderful world. I have to rethink my decision at the age of 30. I mean there's still more in the line. Justin Beiber, Jesse Mccartney and many many more... I'm keeping my fingers crossed.

a longer stay

I don't know when will I be able to visit Baguio again but I am trying to make it before the year ends. Its interesting how I met a lot of people in just a short time that I stayed there. My friends said that the place is not as nice as before. There are lots of things that I have observed in Baguio which I hope will also be adapted here in Metro Manila or way back from where I previously lived. First, the taxi drivers are more polite. I haven't encountered an incident where a taxi driver refused. Here in the Metro it happens a lot and some of them would even ask me to pay more than what is indicated on the meter. Taxi drivers here are mostly rude, they lack good manners. Its very sad knowing that these people should be the first one to show good manners since they are in need of money, well I am in need of money too and I show good manners to them. I don't really like how they treat their passengers here in Metro Manila. Someone should discipline them. Its either they were not raised well at home or this is the result of the poor educational system of the country.

Second thing, vegetables. I really love to eat vegetables rather than meat. They are more tasty to me. I am tired of eating grilled meats here. I don't know where to buy vegetables. I am planning to just boil some vegetables but I am scared that I might overcook them. I don't really know how to cook and cookbooks are very hard to follow these days. I've noticed that as we try to live a simple live every thing gets complicated, try reading old cookbooks and the newer ones and you'll see the difference.

The third thing are the parks. I'm scared to go to the parks in here in Metro Manila even during the day. You'll never know what will happen. Unlike in Baguio though its very dangerous to go out at night but its safe during the day.

But I'm still staying here for another month or so. Depends on the outcome of my job here. I want to go back or maybe stay in Baguio but somehow I don't want to waste the energy of being young. I am more productive here, I would say and even my friends would agree. A few hours of sleep here and I feel so energized already compared to an eight hours of sleep in the south or in Baguio.

Happyness

Yesterday was the one of the happiest day of my life. First I received a call from the company where I applied. I don't expect that I will still get the job since its been more than a week already since I applied for it. I'm going to work on my requirements today and also will have to report for the job offer.

Second, a friend of mine in Baguio gave my number to him. We are not exchanging messages. Its something I've been wanting to happen but never thought that it could become real. I'm planning to go back to Baguio before the year ends.

back in MM

I got tired of Baguio. I've visited most of the places where tourists go. There are still some places that I need to visit but I don't feel like going there anymore. On the bus on my way here I really cried. I wish I can call the place my home. Its a very wonderful place. And I miss someone who lives there too. When were on Marcos Highway I tried to look outside of the window maybe he will be there standing and waving me goodbye, it didn't happen.

One thing I like about Metro Manila is that it has everything I need. Also every time I leave the place I don't cry. I even like it when I leave this place. No one makes me cry here, I realized. There are millions of people living in the metro and I have never cried for someone here unlike other places that I have visited. I am considering maybe staying here for a while. I'm planning on applying for a job. There are some places near here that I want to visit compared if I am living on the southern part of the country.

First I really want to visit Batanes. I've seen pictures about the places and its really breathtaking. You can't believe that such a wonderful scenery can be found in this country. The people there are friendly too according to some folks who have visited the place. I'm planning to visit there during summer and also during rainy season where the place is constantly visited by typhoons. I love strong winds. It brings back those childhood fears.

a single digit

I was wondering if I was cursed. Everywhere I go, all the places that I have visited someone always makes me cry. Today is my last day here in Baguio. I don't like the people here when I first arrived until I met someone. I have mentioned about him in my previous post.

The other night he asked for my number. I don't have my phone with me at that time so I just asked him to send me a text message. And so he did, in front of me. I'm happy to be with him and I consider staying in Baguio and maybe look for a job. I seldom meet interesting and nice people. When I went home and checked my phone I don't see his message. Later then I realized that I made a mistake on one of the digits. I tried to go back last night to where we first met. The night was so cold but I didn't care. What I wanted at that time was to see him and hug him once more. I stayed until midnight but he didn't came. I don't know how to reach him, I don't even know his full name. I hate myself for not being able to memorize my very own phone number.

I cried a lot. Why is it hard to get that happy ending?

dangers of not doing it often

I've read or maybe seen it in movies that girls become emotionally attached even to a stranger once they had sex. I'm a little bit suspicious if I'm becoming more of a woman. I went out with this complete stranger the other night. He was not good looking but he has this very nice personality that makes me like him. He was very nice. I didn't expect that I would miss his company this much. I guess its because I seldom sleep with people I just meet.

I guess if I am used to sleeping with guys I wouldn't feel attached with a person I met just for a one night stand. I have observed this when I was going out with guys every week. I don't feel any emotional attachment no matter how nice or good looking the person was. I guess this is another mistake I made for spending too much time with a single person. I'm really wondering if there is something wrong with me. Even if I just spent an hour talking with a complete stranger after we go on separate ways I start to miss them.

I don't want to feel any emotional attachment with a person. I'm thankful that I'm over with my family. Its one reason I'm scared to go home. What if I get attach to them again and I have that I want to have a family? I'm doing great with my life right now and I don't want to ruin it.

I'm here right now having the same question with one of the movies I've seen. Is it possible to live in this world without loving or being attach with someone? That would be great, I guess.

tired.

I have never thought that having a vacation can be boring sometimes. I lists all the places where I planned to visit but I don't want to visit them anymore. I miss working, a lot. I just realized that is more fun to be working than having a vacation. I miss those times that I'm really tired that I don't want to brush my teeth or I felt so lazy to eat. I really miss those days.

I went out again last night and I met a couple of good looking guys. I dated with one of them. I enjoyed his company and also the things that we did after some strolling around the city.

just a quick question..

I am just curious if its only me or you too feel the same.
When you were asked of where is your girlfriend or if you have a girlfriend what is your usual answer?

In my case sometimes I just smile or I would say that I am still looking or enjoying a single life.

But it doesn't end there, after you answer them, do you have doubts that you convinced them? I sometimes think that I didn't because they still keep on asking. I think this is one of the questions that I am scared to be asked. Do you feel the same?

Beer Night

I went out last night. I didn't enjoy it much, the dance floor is very small. I planned to go to Nevada Square but I've heard that its not safe to go there because of gang wars. So I headed to some bars here. There is a lot of difference between how the people behave in bigger cities. People here tends to get noisy, easily get irritated and is looking for trouble when they get drunk. Its not safe to be with them. Unlike in bigger cities that people don't lose their manners when they are drunk, well there are some but the rate is not as high compared here. People here is like going back to the ancient times. They have this animalistic kind of behavior an example is having its territory and they have it protected.

Their music is quite outdated for my taste. I also love Chopin, Beethoven, and yes, I'm loving them now but if I want to dance I want some trance music. I guess its just with bar. They said that there are some nice bars here, I haven't discovered them yet.

I woke up late today, well 11 am is late for me. I walked around Burnham Park. Its quite interesting how people here still love to go to parks but some also love to stroll in the mall. In most bigger cities going to the park is like an ancient tradition but here is just normal. I'm not sure if this only happens this month because of the Panagbenga or this really happens all year round.

Another year….

I have to look at my passport and the calendar twice just to make sure. Today is my birthday. Another year has been added to my life and just a few more years I guess, hopefully, before I die. I have to do some evaluation of my life. There are some decisions that I regret that I made them though its not the end yet. I am still hoping for the best. Just a few more years and I will have my degree and a few more years from that hopefully I will be in the jungle of Africa helping people there. I really love to work as a volunteer to some non-profit group organizations helping the world alleviate poverty. I know I could not really help some big communities but at least I'm helping. I've cried a lot every time I see pictures and documentaries about them. People are dying due to hunger and they have nothing to eat. A mother watching her son slowly dying because of hunger. I have a lot of things to do in my life in order to help them. First I need to have my degree then another two or three years experienced in my field before I qualify to be sent there, I'm getting there everyday.

I might be staying a couple more days here. I will be going to the Diplomat Hotel today. Hopefully to meet and greet some restless ghost. I don't really believe in them but I love the idea of going inside an abandoned building. I have never been inside an abandoned building that is completely built. Most buildings that I've been to although they are abandoned but they are either destroyed or left unfinished.

I might celebrate my birthday tonight by going to a bar for a drink. Beer here is cheaper compared to Metro Manila and other cities. I have no plans to get drunk but who knows what lies ahead. It was cold here last night and today I could see the sun, shining brightly. Its gonna be a lovely day, I hope.

XOXO,

Grammath

Taking deep breaths

My leg muscles are aching because of yesterdays endless walks. I'm planning to stay indoors today but the thoughts of the green things that I will be seeing and also meeting cute guys seems very hard to resist. There are cute guys here too, I feel bad about them getting stuck with those ugly women. I just wonder why most cute looking guys settle for the not-so-cute looking girls? Have you ever wonder about that?

It seems that taking a vacation is not for me. I find it so boring. Having nothing to do is the most boring thing on Earth and I just realized it. I miss the hustle and bustle of the street and inside the working place. There are still a lot of places to visit here but I miss working more than visiting those places. I might just stay here for a week then I'll go back to Metro Manila.

My Second Day in Baguio

I'm beginning to explore Baguio and also I've known some people here during my stay. They are respectful but not friendly. They will help you if you have money. Baguio is city just like any other city in the country. I was told by someone not to stay late in Burnham Park since a lot of folks got mugged in the area. I was shocked to learn about this since the first thing that would come up in my mind if about Burnham Park is a very quiet and relaxing place. There are lots of people too, I guess because this month they will be celebrating the Panagbenga, I hope I spell it right.

I don't have any night life either, I don't know where to go. A friend said that I can try going to Nevada Square but some of the locals here said that its not a friendly and a safe place. I went to Camp John Hay yesterday. It would be wonderful to own a cottage there but that must be very expensive. I am considering staying here for a year but the idea of strong winds when there is a storm scares me.

Today I went to Mines View. The place is just very small, I wonder why people go there? I mean on your way to Baguio you can see the mountains anyway. I bought some Ube Jam which I ate on my way to Wright Park and Botanical Garden, I just walk. You can just walk the places here and I wonder why everytime I asked for directions they would answer that I can take a jeepney or a cab. Mines View is not really that far from Wright Park. And there are some souvenir stores too in Mines View. One thing that get my attention is the Chinese Horoscopes. There was one animal that get my attention. The year of the Cock, was it supposed to be rooster or Cock? I tried to look for it online and yes there is a year of the Cock.

I am planning to visit the Diplomat Hotel tomorrow. They said there are ghosts in the area. I'm not really religious or do I believe in them but I want to visit the place. They said its already abandoned. I'm excited to visit the place.

xoxo,
Grammath, Baguio City

Baguio: First Day

I was supposed to get on a 5 am trip to Baguio but I woke up past 6 am already, I must be too excited. I enjoyed the scenery on my way here. I don't exactly remember how long the trip was but I do spend countless of hours sitting on the bus. They played "Dead na si Lolo" and I forgot the other one. It was a Filipino love story.

When I arrived here I was disappointed with the place where I'm staying. Not that I'm demanding hotel amenities but the I was asked to pay for the amount higher than what we agreed. I guess what I've read was true that if you don't know anyone here the cost of you daily allowance is the same as traveling in the North America. This place is far expensive compared to where I stayed in Makati. Not to think that I stayed in an airconditioned room and with a wi-fi. This place is just an old house without even a shower.

So the first thing I did after buying a charger for my phone is to look for another place to stay. I roam around Burnham Park and there are some folks there offering transients at a lower cost. I was able to look for a place and I will be transferring there today. It was just right in front of Burnham Park. Its cheaper than where I am staying right now, I have a small television in my room and it has a manual heater which I have no plan of using.

On my first day, I ate a lot of strawberries and I also went to the city library since they have a free wi-fi there, but it didn't work. After some strolling around Burnham Park, I decided to call it day. I was decided to finish reading some ebooks that I have downloaded but I was surprised that there are lots of unsecured wireless connection in my neighborhood. I was able to get online which is what I am using right now. Its not really stealing, I guess since my laptop automatically connects to them. I didn't ask my laptop to get some connection, it just worked on its own. Anyway, I was happy with my laptop, it never fails to make me proud. And as a treat for my laptop I'm gonna spend another hour here to update its software.

The place is not that cold though but I so much love to take a bath here. The water is cold, very addicting. I am planning to spend most of my days today at Burnham after I finish transferring. I don't know where can I rent some rollerblades and go roller skating. I also want to go horse back riding but it seems boring to do it here. I was not allowed back in our province to ride on our horses. I felt so envious with my cousins when they can and they can ride and have the horses running very fast. But I don't think you can have the horses there run fast, as what I have observed there just walking, so boring.